Help for Healing

Bitter & Sweet, living daily with grief

Be Careful What You Wish For

3 Comments

So it has been an exciting, emotional week. Me? Emotional? I have been recognizing that as the book draws closer to the launching date, I am getting more and more intense. Crying at the drop of a hat. Sometimes the hat doesn’t even drop and I cry anyway. I have theories I guess. The subject matter is intense and grief-ridden. That’s one thing. When you pour your heart and soul into something for 13 months, that’s pretty intense. That’s another thing.

On Monday, Brigette was here working with me and we had a conference call scheduled with our Hospice contact. There was some question as to whether they were going to be able to be involved or not so this was a crucial call. They came through with fulfilling our highest hopes. They are going to handle all the press releases which is a huge burden lifted from our shoulders. The release will go to radio stations, newspapers, and tv stations. She mentioned that we would probably get at least one tv station to cover the launching.

They are also trying to get a tv personality to emcee the event and get us on their tv program the week before the launching. We answered “okay” as if this sort of thing happens to us every day. I was stunned and silent, terrified.

On Tuesday, we received a review of the book from a big, important dude at Sloan Kettering in NYC, the #2 cancer treatment center in the USA. We asked for a two sentence blurb. We got a two page review. And it was GLOWING. And more importantly, his words indicated that he truly got the whole book- he just plain got it. He got what I was hoping readers would get from it. He is a total stranger too. No bias on his part. I sobbed. Like a baby.

Tuesday afternoon I made contact with Roswell (Cancer hospital in our area). Given the other events of the week, their person was like “thanks for letting us be a part of this!”…. She was thanking me and excited about figuring out how they could help. What??

This all set me into a tailspin. Isn’t this what we have been working our butts off for? Then why I am numb? On Wednesday I talked with my daughter Emily. I decided she has a very wise, old soul. She listened to everything, including the review. She calmly said she knew exactly what my problem was. My problem was that my world just got bigger. Much bigger. My problem is that I’ve never experienced this level of success in my life before. She calmly said she now knows the purpose of why her father died. Now she knows that he is taking care of Frankie and I. We are going to have enough to live on and we are going to be able to take care of our house. Anyone that knew Tim, knew he worried about that. That’s why he worked til two weeks before he died.

Emily. She’s brilliant. She put it into words for me. It took some of the terror away. Today I had my spiritual direction session and we discussed it further. She cried too when she heard about the events of the week. We talked about how I don’t know how to wear success. I understand hard work, but I don’t know what to do with having it pay off.

Don’t get me wrong. When I wake up from the dream, I will be grateful. I figured out how to be grateful in the face of disease and death. I just have to figure out how to be grateful in the face of positive happenings. But careful for what you wish for, it just might scare the pants off you!

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Author: helpforhealing

Darcy Thiel, MA is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor in NY State. She earned her Master’s Degree in Clinical Psychology from Wheaton College in Wheaton, IL. Ms. Thiel has been a couple and family therapist in West Seneca, New York since the mid-1990’s. Ms. Thiel is currently an adjunct professor at Medaille College in Buffalo, NY. She is also an accomplished speaker and presenter on various topics throughout the Western NY area. She is the proud author of Bitter and Sweet: A Family’s Journey with Cancer, the prequel to Life After Death, on This Side of Heaven. To learn more about Ms. Thiel and other exciting books from Baby Coop Publishing, LLC, visit her website at www.babycooppublishing.com or www.darcythiel.com Copyright Help for Healing by Darcy Thiel © 2012-2016. All rights reserved.

3 thoughts on “Be Careful What You Wish For

  1. It sounds like the bitter in your life is fading and many sweet things are coming your way. Try to enjoy the moment it sounds like an incredible journey you are on. Your husband’s love for you certainly has no boundaries.

  2. Hi, Who was your Roswell contact? I am kind of curious. I am still home sick. Sherry

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  3. This is something that was crossing my mind so I thought I would share it. I think it applies to this topic and I know you will get the connection…

    Life seems so simple, then you find yourself in a confusing place where nothing seems to make sense and the solution appears impossible, or at best, futile to expect. It’s at that point in time, when crossroads meet and things become clearer, that you realize there is hope. Without it, there is no point. Wishing a day filled with hope to all of those who matter to me

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